Surfacing After Silence

Life. After.

thankfulness


CUS474Thankful

I dedicate this post to my friend, Mindy, whose blog post from a few months ago made me pause and think about how things have been recently.  Mindy wanted to practice noticing things to be joyful about.  I realized that while I’ve been trying to give words to my progress this summer, this in itself has required that I dwell on or explain some of the stressful things as well.  And the other day, someone asked me how I was, and my response was, “I thought I’d be better than this by now.”  Not fixed or fully recovered, but better than this.  But I cannot deny the progress and moments of joy.  So I’m making my own list.

  • I am very pleased with the psychiatrist I am working with in NY.  I was very nervous about it, but it’s gone well.
  • Meeting up with old friends has been wonderful.
  • I had forgotten how beautiful upstate NY can be. 
  • I’ve had some very gratifying talks with my parents, and our relationship has gotten stronger.
  • I am doing significantly better than I was in May.
  • I have had some difficult conversations with doctors, which in the past I wouldn’t have done.
  • I have a new kitten named Camena. 
  • I am writing again. 

 

In my wise mind, I am proud of myself for this summer, for how I’ve handled the transition, for how I’ve been assertive, and how I’ve allowed myself some grace in the fact that I know I will not be cured in a day, and that I will have bad days.

I like that I have this list here, because when I’m in my emotion mind, I tend to be harsh on myself and I feel anything but proud.  This list reminds me of my progress, my joy, and my growing strength.

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September 10, 2014 - Posted by | Uncategorized | , , , , , , , ,

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