Surfacing After Silence

Life. After.

A Weekend Challenge


I’ve been noticing something on Facebook again.  Yes, yes, I know.  Too much time on Facebook.  I honestly do have a life full of other things.  But back to what I’ve noticed:  the amount of care and worry and concern we all have for our friends, and how Facebook has given us a way to leave encouraging messages on our friends’ walls.  We can remind them of all that they are fighting for and how much we care for them and how much they are worth the fight.  On a difficult day, how nice it is to see kind words from friends.  On a day when we want to give up, we are reminded why we must keep forging ahead.  We have lists of reasons for each other.

Why not apply this same amount of care and concern and worry and encouragement to yourself?

So here is my challenge for this beautiful Sunday afternoon, and any day when you need a little boost:

Write a wall post to yourself as if you were writing your best friend.  Remind yourself why you are fighting and why you can’t give up.  Tell yourself that you are worried about the direction you are headed.  Tell yourself that you are worth it and deserve it. If you find that this is difficult, find a recent post that you wrote to someone else and substitute your name for his or her name.  Then post this comment on your own wall.  Then, write it down on an index card or a slip of paper and stick it in your wallet or use it as a bookmark so that you see it several times a day.

My current bookmark is a list of all the reasons I could think of of why I could not relapse, which turned into a “all the reasons I want to live” list.  Each time I open my book, I see that reminder.  Even on good days, it’s a comforting affirmation of why I chose recovery.  Write down what you stand to lose by choosing the eating disorder.  Write down all you stand to gain by choosing life.  Keep these lists near.

You spend so much time encouraging others.  YOU deserve that same amount of energy and time.  YOU deserve that same amount of care and love.  I know it’s difficult to see that, to believe that, but if you practice it enough, if you make these lists and read them enough, it becomes easier.  Each time you read the list of all you stand to gain by choosing life one more reason will dig its claws into you.  Life will begin calling to you, and its voice will keep getting stronger the more you listen.

Choose life.  Choose to treat yourself as if you were your best friend.  Some day, you will find that you are your best friend.

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July 17, 2011 - Posted by | depression, Eating Disorders, recovery, relationships | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

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