A Letter of Hope and Encouragement
I was reading on Facebook, reading a post on a certain page, and Jamie had written a letter to a friend, reminding her that her worth lies in the internal beauty and gifts and talents and not the external–not what any scale says, not what any number says, not what the size of her clothes are. She reminds us that a scale is a 2 inch piece of metal and springs–nothing more, nothing less. She gave me permission to use the letter here. As a possible trigger, there are numbers included, but at no point does Jamie reveal the highest or lowest weight or her current weight. The numbers are metaphors and not points of comparison. I found this letter full of hope and encouragement, reminding us all that we are more than our shapes, our sizes, our numbers. The real beauty of each of us lies within and no one can take that away from us:
Dear Beautiful Girl,
You are more than a reflection in the mirror. More than the number on a scale. More than the size of your jeans. You are YOU. In all the world there is not another like you. Why do we as women have such a hard time accepting ourselves for who we are, where we are? When did you become a body instead of a being? My answer is probably different than yours yet it leads us both to the same place of discontentment. We rejoice over the dimples in a babies thighs or the little rolls on a toddlers tummy, yet we can stand in front of a mirror ( which by the way, is no more than a piece of glass ) and berate ourselves for hours at a time for these very same characteristics. Why? For some it’s a learned behavior I suppose. We’ve grown up in a society that teaches us from early on that beauty is skin deep. That who we are and what we can be IS determined by the reflection, by the number, by the size. For some it goes deeper. How we view our bodies has developed as a result of some kind of trauma. Abuse in any form can destroy how we view ourselves. Abuse by others and also abuse we inflict on our own bodies. On the souls living within our skin. My body isn’t perfect. It wasn’t when it was 20 lbs lighter nor was it when it was 20 lbs heavier. I am short, by the worlds standards I will never qualify as a ‘supermodel’. But at what point will I allow myself to say, ‘screw the worlds standards’, and decide that who I am is good enough. When will I accept that my God given gifts and abilities do NOT change regardless of whether The Gap tells me I’m a size 2 or a size 20. So many days I begin by standing on this little white square that I have given complete power to. This box can in a matter of 5 seconds determine the mood I start my day in. Whether I eat or don’t eat can be decided by this box. Whether I dress to be noticed or hide my body…also determined by it. If you take this contraption apart, you will find one tiny metal spring. I’ve given the control of my life, of my emotions, over to a 2″ piece of metal. Kinda eye opening to look at it that way. If I got up every morning and looked at the spring instead of what it’s housed in, would it have as much power? I don’t think so. Honestly, I think it would feel pretty silly. So why do I give my body, my ‘house’ more power than the soul within it? My body is visible. Your body is visible. And yet everything that controls the outside is located INSIDE. So why do we put the constant focus on what’s displayed on the outside? I’ve looked a complete mess lately. Hair every which way, baggy clothes, no makeup… In some ways I believe that my outside is finally lining up with the ‘spring’ inside of me. I’m allowing myself to just BE. No expectations, no pretenses. It’s just me. Take me or leave me. Because if my appearance is why you love me, I’d rather you didn’t bother. I’d rather be loved for my unloveliness than idolized for someone I’m not. You, my friend, my sister are 100% flawed perfection! If you were perfect, people would be intimidated by you. You are beautiful, absolutely stunning in who you are. Because the spring inside you is lovely, YOU are lovely. You radiate life and joy and love. Life, joy & love are the best examples of beauty that I can think of. So girlfriend, OWN who you are! Allow yourself to look in the mirror and tell the girl within you how absolutely gorgeous she is. I know she needs to hear it right now. Build her up instead of tearing her down. And praise the God who handcrafted her for what an amazing and awe inspiring work of beauty He created.
You are beautiful and oh so loved…
Remember that that piece of metal is just that . . . a piece of metal. YOU are so much more, with gifts to offer the world and love to share with those you come in contact with. The beauty of you is YOU and will remain YOU regardless of your size or any number of measurement.